Love: A Closer Look

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her... So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, because we are members of His body. FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH." -Ephesians 5:25, 28-31

"In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another." - 1 John 4:10-11

"If someone says, 'I love God,' and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen. And this commandment we have from Him, that the one who loves God should love his brother also." - 1 John 4:20-21

Loving Family... what a subject! I don't think that it's one we could spend just one day and cover everything. I don't think we could cover what it means to love your family in a week's time! I mean, sure, you could read all of the information in about one week, but to truly understand it to the point of application... not so much.
Let's just take a look at a couple of things really quickly, though... Husbands love your wives... This one's important! You know, I've seen so many studies and heard so many conferences about this subject alone. Wives have a God-given need and desire for love from their husbands, just as husbands have a God-given need and desire for respect and the feeling of being needed. When a husband does not feel that he is a vital part of what's going on, he loses his sense of self-worth. In the same way, the wife loses all sense of self-worth when not treated with the love that she deserves. And she certainly deserves to be loved!
Look at the verse from Ephesians again... "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her..." JUST AS CHRIST ALSO LOVED THE CHURCH!!! There's a whole lot of love there! To the point of death. Not only so, but also with the way that He spent His whole life in service to those whom He was going to save, through His death and resurrection.
As I referred to earlier in this study, when John talks about "Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends." (John 15:13), he is not talking specifically about dying for someone else, he is talking about DAILY surrender of your own desires and, instead, serving those whom you love. This is the type of love that husbands must have towards their wives, as well as verbal re-assurances of their love. Wives need to hear these kinds of things from their husbands, whether they already know them or not is NOT the point! Verbalize and re-affirm your love for your wives. The unspoken sometimes becomes the unknown... there must be communication in order for there to be a love that lasts!
As an aside, wives... it is imperative that you also show your love to your husbands through the respect that Paul also talks about in Ephesians 5. Paul absolutely knew what he was talking about when he gave these two commands to the church in Ephesus... there is a God-given need in each of us, either for love or for respect, and when those needs are neglected... you get the messed up society we live in today! Congratulations! We've once again distorted the God-ordained order of things and, once again, declared our independence from God... What a wicked and depraved generation we have today... Friends! If only we would follow half of what we know to be true in God's Word... we would have finished the work of the Great Commission and the Gospel would have already reached the farthest ends of the earth! But, instead, we sit and listen to what is preached about love, and about laying down your life... then we return to our 21st century American lives and don't give a second thought to the whole thing!
Our marriages would not be falling apart if we could follow the simple commands that God has given! Our children would not stray from an upright path and from godliness if we just taught them a genuine love for God and for things that are of HIM! Why am I saying this??? Why do I mention such things in a study about love? ...because that's the problem... We don't love enough to make ourselves care enough about anything other than ourselves. If we could grasp these concepts of loving others and loving God then we would be able to begin to understand why it's so important to follow His commands! It would begin to make sense... if only we knew how to love like Christ loved us.
Friends, this is why I bring to light these things that we're doing wrong... because they are simply the result of selfishness, instead of love...
If you loved your children with the same love that Christ loves your children... how closely would you monitor what they watch and what they hear? How quick would you be to correct the behavior that does not exemplify godliness in their lives? How much would you stress the importance of loving God? How much emphasis would you put on loving them and laying down your own desires so that they might know that you love them?
Husband... if you loved your wife as Christ loved the church "...and gave Himself up for her..." how would you spend your time? Does watching television exemplify the love of Christ being manifested in you, and then that love being shown towards your wife? Do all of the projects and activities? All of the time spent away from home? How often do you call and tell her, "Hey, I was just calling to see how you're doing... I love you!"? How often do you help her out around the house and show that you care about how much time and effort she puts into making it a place that can be called home?
Am I saying that I have accomplished all of these things? Far from it! But I see the need and I plead with God, that He might give me the strength and fortitude to uphold these things in my life. I'm not even married yet! But I know that marriage is not an easy, blissful, thing that you just float through for the rest of your life... I have parents too!
Unmarried folks... this is the time to prepare your hearts and to understand what true love looks like so that you don't walk into a marriage and hit a brick wall! It's not all fun and games! It WILL be hard! I don't care what you feel when you're around him or her right now... it will NOT be easy. If it were easy... it wouldn't be called life.
I am sorry if this seems like a depressing message to you... but what's so depressing about true love? The fact that it's hard? The fact that you have to work at it? Here's something that always encourages me: Christ never asks us to do something that He himself didn't do! Jesus didn't tell Peter, "Get out of the boat and go walk on the water!" while He stood by on the shore or in the boat. No! He was already treading on the water and Peter came out to where Christ was already standing! Therefore, fix your eyes on Jesus, He's already standing there, on the other side! "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." - Philippians 4:13 "...for it is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure." - Philippians 2:13

Friends this is what God-honoring love looks like! Let us strive to love and act as Christ so modeled for us. My hope is that this study of love has stirred in your heart a desire to please God in how you love Him and others.

On today's subject, I assure you, there are many, more qualified, people who could tell you more in-depth how to develop this love in your life, but I preach Christ and for that I am not ashamed! I would encourage you to speak with a godly and mature fellow believer about any questions or possibly the steps that you need to take in developing the fruit of love in your life. I will say it again, IT'S NOT EASY, but is is definitely worth it! To love like Christ... what greater thing is there that we could accomplish in this life? If you would like some resources on today's topic, please leave me a comment on today's posting and I will try to find some biblically sound books that might help you!

God bless you, my friends, and may His Grace and Peace be with you all!
Next week I will begin the study of Joy... and that is something I'm looking forward to, very much! Thanks for reading, and have a great weekend!

P.S. - I would like to clarify a point about my reference to the meaning of John 15:13 as written in this blog... I, no way, meant that the actual sacrificing of one's life is not to be considered one of the greatest sacrifices and greatest displays of love that a person can make. My heart especially goes out to our beloved and brave troops that are currently defending the very freedom of speech that we have! Without their love displayed through the blood that has been shed, our freedom would not exist... plain and simple.
That being said... the literal translation of John 15:13, from the Hebrew language, would read as I have noted in my blog. So, I am not relinquishing my point on daily sacrificing of personal desires in exchange for a life devoted to the service of love, but am also not ruling out the power of love displayed through the literal sacrifice of one's life for another. Am I above God that I could nullify the power of Christ's death on the cross as the ONLY way for us to be saved from our sins? May it never be! Just to be clear, I believe with all of my heart that Jesus Christ, the Son of God, is THE Way, THE Truth, and THE Life and that no one comes to God except through HIM. Let it never be misunderstood as otherwise.
Thanks for the clarifying comment, Nick! God Bless!